MERRY KITSCHMAS: MY PRESENT

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PRThese are actual current or recent Christmas ornament offerred by lovely people on the largest internet auction site in the world. This is a virtual installation piece that I've wanted to do for the last couple of years.

The thing that spurred me on was the recent 23 million dollar sale (?) of Jeff Koons' "Hanging Heart". Koons appropriated this design from another designer and then Jeff made it big. Whoop.

I'm sure you'll find my endeavor a better, deeper and obviously cheaper art experience and a special Christmas parade of the tragic, hillarious, bizarre, immoral and gorgeous remnants of our century old capitalist and media sponsored rush toward dumping our year-end disposable income. Save the ECONOMY! Spend in December! I'm giving it away!!!!

The text in gold is my narative. The text in white is either a descriptive term from the seller or a comment made by one of my twisted friends in response to the images. Many of the images are low resolution but some of them are larger files and are actually quite beautiful. I've indicated which images have larger "click-throughs". Despite the tenor of the text, I do respect and admire the love people have for these ornaments.

The irony of this will come in a follow up posting in february.

xxx

THE NIGHT BEFORE KITSCHMAS

They come from subterranean worlds or lofty heights,

boxed carefully or in jumbled piles but rarely in between.

They signify a distant shadow of our national origin and the imaginary dress of our ancestors who were more often in rags - like the slaves that make them.

Secretly, with inner joy, they shout our handicaps.


And insure infirmity from mother to child.

They share secrets in plain site.

Their beauty belies their substance,

and courts obscenity.

Their love of nature is false and hidden.

But Everybody likes this.

Everybody cheers their anthem of love.

Because they confirm our similarity while defining our style.

And sometimes they provide some proof about something we know.

Things come out of storage in a jumble.

It is impossible to make sense all at once.

But types are sorted...

"MADE OF A BRITTLE RUBBER-LIKE MATERIAL"

and form a tribe.

By hook or by crook

through thick and thin

"MADE OF 'TAVERN WAX'"

we all come together to worship as one.

"completly unused - mint in box"

Our fears make us simple.

"Why can't you have fun?"

"The party's just started!"

There's always a moment when the one turns to tears.

Don't make us all sad now because presents are coming!

Good boys wear Prada.

Bad girls wear none.

Beauty becomes us,

As booties we buy...

'till beauty consumes us,

"Ben, the two of us need look no more

We both found what we were looking for

With a friend to call my own I'll never be alone

And you, my friend, will see You've got a friend in me (you've got a friend in me).."

and we're all just fried.

"I think this is a complete set of McDonalds McNugget Christmas Ornaments."

It's over too soon and maybe forever

"all are made of unbreakeable plastic - safe for kids and pets..."

We see ourselves fading back to the world.

We took ourselves out - now we're not mint in box.


---------THE END--------

CONCEPT AND CONTENTS k. bringe 2007

POSTSCRIPT & ADDENDUM

I ask you to think about the history of these objects - the line to market; the artist or designer responds to the trends and last years sales (pixies grabbing their knees) and they infuse aesthetic and champion their idea for resources to the company - who is rarely if ever the manufacturer. The company goes to the manufacturers in poor third world companies -with slave wagers. Prototypes are made. Formen are beaten. And the stuff is shipped back here. The consumers makes exquisite choices with their little money. They die and the family members and peers hating their decisions prompt the estate sale...

"Sometimes I think the Grandmother died and they took her good stuff. And then they threw the Christmas crap on the carpet and took a polaroid and shoved it on the auction site." --Previewer of the 2007 Kitschmas Bizare.

I liked these:

"MADE OF A BRITTLE RUBBER-LIKE MATERIAL"